Kicked

A guy slips on the ice and falls on his leg, snapping his ankle. He lies on the cold sidewalk unable to get up. A kind stranger lady lends him a blanket to stave off the chill, and calls 911 for him. The ambulance arrives. "You are in good hands," the kind lady says, taking back the blanket. The paramedic smiles at her comment, then slips himself on the ice, kicking the injured man's foot as he struggles to maintain his balance. The injured man screams in pain. There is an echo, as the paramedic's partner slips on the ice pulling the stretcher out. He ends up on the ground under the stretcher, swearing.

How to start the day.

At least the patient got 10 mg of morphine, enough to forget getting his broken ankle kicked. We are best buddies by the time we hit the triage desk.

***

Then it was back to the BS calls.

An employee "passes out." The doctor on the scene says, "I think she may be having a seizure." Her eye lids are twitching, I hold her hand over her face and let go, she keeps her hand in the air, she is making sounds in the back of her like someone getting ready to hack a looey, she starts speaking, babbling "Kuntakuntakunta." She rolls her eyes in the back of her head when I try to examine them. Her vitals are all fine. When we get her in the ambulance, she stops her fit, but will only speak in whispers. "I'm half deaf," I shout over and over, "Speak up! There is absolutely no reason for her to be whispering.

She asks "What happened?"

"You took off all your clothes and ran naked around the building," I say.

Not really.

***

An elderly man feels dizzy after standing up suddenly. The dizziness lasts 30 seconds. He feels fine. The nurse insists he go to the ER. His heart rate is only in the 40's, but he is on a beta blocker that is not inconsistent with a low heart rate. I ask her to look at his old records. His heart rate is nornmally in the 40's. We still go to the ER.

***

A doctor's office for chest pain. Patient had pain last night, feels fine today. She wants him to go to the ER to get evaluated. She calls for the ambulance. He is warm and dry, pain free. She gives him nothing, doesn't do an ECG, just calls us.